In Love ...

Well ... almost.

I don't really subscribe to the doctrine of love at first sight, but the opening scene of the first episode of Californication almost took the cake. I got the 1st disc in the mail yesterday and watched the whole thing while attempting to clean my house. Very funny ... between this Weeds and Dexter, Showtime really has a pretty awesome line-up. I can't get into the Tudors and haven't seen the L Word, Brotherhood or the new show, Crash, so don't have an opinion on those. Can't wait for Blockbuster to put the next disc in the mail.

On a different note ... going to the Ravens game in a few minutes and all I hear out my window is the wind so I am sure this is going to be a fun one.

My Christmas

Is it considered a tangent when you start with it?? Anyways ... here is a package I received in the mail from Hawaii (Click to make it bigger and read the bottom). Thanks Uncle Lance & Aunt Karen, it's hanging on my chimney until I have a complete house:



After the adventures of searching for lunch ... this is how the rest of my day went:

• Watched program on how beer is losing market share in the alcoholic beverage industry and what brewers are doing to combat this with my Mom and sister
• Watched "Prince Caspian (2nd chapter of the Narnia stories), again with Mom and sis
• Aunt and Dad got home; Aunt went to nap, Dad left to let a dog out somewhere
• Started cooking roast (not me), finished Caspian movie
• Dad got back, started "Nightmare Before Christmas" after unsuccessfully finding something interesting to watch on TV
• Opened gifts (we only do stockings and got/gave mostly giftcards so it didn't take long)
• Ate dinner
• Sis' BF showed up
• Started playing Loaded Questions (more below)
• Finished playing Loaded Questions (Dad won)
• Went home (with a stop at Blockbuster)
• Watched Mummy movie (third one, with Jet Li) while hanging laundry and cleaning up
• Passed out

Loaded Questions is an awesome game but I have to warn against playing it with family. The basic idea of the game is that everyone writes down their answer to a question and the person whose turn it is has to attribute each answer to one of the players. There are also reversals where everyone has to write down what they think the person whose turn it is will answer. The game is great when you have a lot of creative people or are aided in creativity through some fluid means (not that I know what that means). "Why the warning," you ask? One of the questions was, "What is the most expensive item you have stolen?" ... my dad was guessing among answers like, "an office stapler" and "a binder." Shit, I am not going to answer that question honestly ... I was in college ... and a teenager growing up in boring ass Columbia ... now, I'm not saying I am (or was) a kleptomaniac at any point, but I won't deny acquiring a keg or 2 through unscrupulous means over the years or maybe some other random things like 5 gallon tubs of ice cream from the school cafeteria or one of those newspaper things on the street corner (OK, that wasn't me ... but when I showed up at DT and Snuggles' apartment ON CAMPUS and was able to get the Sunday paper in their living room ... it was pretty funny) or just something more significant than office supplies. [See, I can go on a tangent at the beginning and end of a post] Just remember, you've been warned about playing with family ... otherwise, it's an awesome game.

I'm Going to Miss You in the New Year

I woke up determined yesterday morning. "Determined to do what?" you ask ... to get some form of burrito-type food for lunch. Thankfully, Columbia provides with me every possibility to get this food and my Mom happens to live in Columbia.

On my way home I headed to my favorite of the main four (Chipotle) and they had some clever sign on the door indicating how the Silent Night is overlapping into a silent day and they will be closed (Chipotle definitely has the best marketing team of the four). Next stop ... well kinda, I didn't pull into the shopping center but looked from the main road to see that Q'doba was also closed. Across the street from that shopping center housed a Baja Fresh, but I couldn't see it from the street and had to pull in. I drove by another empty building and continued on my quest. On the way to the next stop I had to drive by the Dog Pub and noticed 4 or 5 cars outside and made a note in case I was unsuccessful in my mission. The final stop was California Tortilla ... again I was faced with an empty store. Instead of heading back to Dog Pub, I parked and decided to get sushi at the place next door to Cal Tort.

After a call home to see what they wanted, I placed an order for some edamame, an eel & avocado roll, a shrimp tempura roll and a California roll. While waiting for the meal, I thought about this competition coming up and starting making a (mental) list of all the things I am going to miss when I start and about how (if I am successful) I won't be able to go back to the way it used to be. So basically ... I wrote all this just to say:

"Chipotle ... you'll be missed!"

Oh, and I got a Chipotle giftcard yesterday and am making it a goal to use it before the 5th.

On a different (and sad) note

Does anyone know anything about this? I think some people from the area read this and I was shocked when I saw this headline. The woman was only 22.

Happy Holidays

Since I doubt I will write anything tomorrow, I figure I should say Happy Holidays to everyone out there.

Since it is a half day at work I will be heading to Mahaffey's for 30-cent wings and a couple beers before finishing up my shopping and heading to my Mom's for dinner tonight. I think I want to bring my PS3 and the Dark Knight to her house so I can watch it in all it's high-def (and IMAX) glory on my 57 inch TV with surround sound, both of wich are too big for my house and have essentially been donated to my Mom.

Breakfast in My Pants ... Really

Saturday night I went to a friend's house out in the 'burbs for a small holiday get together. Being that NFL Network sucks and made the Ravens game on Saturday night, I decided to ignore everyone until the end of the game ... or at least until Le'Ron McClain reached his 82nd yard on that last play after introducing the Cowboys' safety to the turf, face first.





After the game was over, I had some fun playing Scene It on the host's Xbox and realized that it was much better than any board game or other DVD game because it came with buzzers and everyone answered with those, instead of yelling out the answer. It was kind of like playing trivia at a bar/restaurant with those keypads. After a little Rockband we decided to do our white elephant gift exchange.

This is where the title comes into play. One girl brought a gift in the most awesome bag ever and I had to have it; no matter what was inside. I didn't care if there was a brick in it (like the gifts I prepared for other exchanges), I was going to have it. Since there were not a lot of people and most didn't seem used to this type of exchange, there was not a lot stealing going on and I ended up with it pretty easily. The contents of the "Santa Pants" included a very awesome smelling bag of coffee, some strawberry pancake mix and some strawberry syrup. I don't remember the brands, but it all seems like high quality stuff.



Everyone else got stuff too ... I am sure they were good gifts, but I was too fixated on my breakfast pants to notice. Someone did get a couple DVDs that sparked a long conversation about movies and ultimately ended with someone putting on Love Actually. I'm not exactly sure how we got to Love Actually, but there were points in the conversation that talked about the multiple interconnected storylines of Crash (with Thandie Newton and Don Cheadle not the creepy movie about people turned on by car crashes) and something about Keira Knightley. Anyways, this movie contains one of my favorite sappy scenes in movies I wouldn't admit to watching ... and yes, I watched the scene multiple times to find a decent version on youtube:

"Bad Idea" Personified

Friday night I met up with my friend Shelley for some drinks at the local watering hole. We hung out for about an hour before I had to head to my friend Amy's (and her roommates') "40 Ounces of Holiday Cheer" (or something like that) party. This turned out to be the worst idea I have had in the last 6 years (in terms of drinking decisions). For those of you unfamiliar with the process ... too bad, I'm not explaining ... the pictures will give you an idea. I now have to agree with my buddy Newman's philosophy, "people should not drink malt liquor." I also will add that if one decides to ignore Newman's words of wisdom, one should not forget to eat dinner (thankfully I did have a couple pieces of Shelley's 'dilla from the bar) and have half a dozen beers at the bar before doing so.




Yes this is blurry, but so was I at that point ... it's an artistic shot conveying the perception of the subject.

The Present Unwrapped

Since I am working from home, I can take pictures of the brick work and immediately post them. A little before and after:

My First Present of the Season

Actually, it's not so much of a present since I will be paying for it ... but I am happy none the less. My contractor is coming by tomorrow with his brick guy to repair many of the holes in my house. I'll be sure to post pictures once it's done.

Now, off to the bar for dinner and drinks ... Yellow Dog in Canton, I wonder how it will be.

When more turns into less

Is it bad that I am trying to gain or at least maintain my weight before the weight-loss competition starts on January 5th?

I have been eating what I want (getting Chipotle whenever I can since that will be missed the most), drinking soda, and having regular beer (lagers, stouts) instead of the usual light beers. I am not trying hard to gain weight, but not watching what I eat as I normally would. The problem is, I have lost weight (not much) since last week and am kinda confused. I hope this means I should be able to lose weight easily when I commit to it in a couple weeks, but I don't want to go in having already lost some. Remember ... I am competitive and want to win, even if my goals are to be healthy and get in the routine of working out.

That's all I got for right now ... I'll try and be more interesting soon, working on some house posts and thinking a lot about career options.

Weekend Review

I don't have any pictures from Friday night, nor do I have the writing ability to accurately describe the events that transpired. I will say this though, the night involved all of the following for some or all of the people in my group:

• Bartender's
• Trivia Pursuit cards
• Teachers
• A vice-principal ralphing outside the bar's window
• Some game involving charades
• Getting carded for ordering water
• Someone giving someone else's number to the bartender
• Defining the term "Cranking a Squeege"

Saturday I went out with Newman looking at houses. He is in the market to buy and I wanted to see a bunch of houses in Canton that weren't mine and I couldn't afford. We looked at a total of 10 houses and he found 2 he really likes, and 1 that would be an awesome investment (short sale) but was too big for what he wanted. After looking at the houses, we grabbed some food at Nacho Mama's (love this place) then parted ways before the holiday party that night.

I got to the party a little early so I could set-up Rockband and help out if necessary. I think this year was more fun for me than last year because more people from work showed up and several from my group of friends. We played some Rockband (I sang and everyone kinda stopped talking for a minute and looked over to see if they needed to call for an ambulance) had some good food and counted the minutes till the gift exchange. I am not going to explain the format, but let's just say there was lots of stealing and plenty of strategery going on. I think I ended up with one of the best gifts because of it. I do, however, feel a little bad for whoever got my gift. I used a gift bag and wrapped a brick (since I have plenty of them lying around) in tissue, then placed two of those mini-cereal boxes on top with more tissue paper. Actually, I loaded it with tissue paper so no one would be able to see the brick. People were stealing it since it was heavy and they thought there was something good in there. There was a Starbucks giftcard, but it was under the cardboard under the brick ... thankfully the person found it before throwing the bag out. For your viewing pleasure:





Sunday was fun (other than the Ravens losing). This was the first game I went to with my dad, and his second game ever. He didn't come to the tailgate, but seemed to have a good time during the game (until the end when he had to break-up a fight while leaving). Not really much to say about the game, I can't be too upset because the Ravens had 3 chances to score a TD and couldn't ... plus, I am pretty confident in the ability of the Steelers to get 6 inches if that touchdown wasn't overturned (if you didn't see (or hear about) the game, none of that will make sense). I didn't drink much throughout the day because I had to bolt right at the end so I could make our volleyball game. We went 1 - 2 and after the game I was pretty pissed ... I hate losing.

Accountability Doesn't Mean You're Good at Math

I've been told that telling others something makes you more likely to follow through with it since it creates a sense of accountability. I hope this happens to be the case for this. Even though it isn't starting till January, I joined the other day and paid my money now ... so it's fresh on my mind. I am doing a biggest loser type competition at my gym. It consists of 3 teams of 4-6 people and lasts 8 weeks. Each week you have one personal training session and one group training session, plus whatever you do on your own. It cost a lot of money, but I feel like the value to me is going to come from getting in the routine of going to the gym ... also, 16 training sessions is a lot and should prove to be very helpful. I'm usually not motivated to do something unless there is some form of competition involved, so that is also a reason I feel this will be helpful. Here are some random thoughts as to why I am doing this ... and also a wonderful photo timeline of my fabulous physique.

I am a large man. Not large like I need to buy 2 seats on an airplane, but large enough that I can still shop at J. Crew (since I am the epitome of preppy? Let's go with Old Navy), but could also find some clothes at the Big & Tall store on the corner. I'm over 6'3'' and tip the scale at a scant 275 lbs ... and I've never really lifted weights (consistently) in my life, so its not like I have any kind of athletic build. When I was in Chile this past January and my friend ordered me a drink, he directed the waiter to me and the waiter's response was, "Ah, grande hombre, si?" Classic.

While my weight is not something I am overly concerned about (who wouldn't like to lose some weight), my health is. I used to play basketball 3 to 4 nights a week (even skipping night classes if necessary) and pick-up football games on the weekend in college. I also played in every intramural sports there was (until I was suspended from intramurals my last semester). I was a smoker then (19 months since my last one) and drank almost every night, but I never felt as tired as I do now. I don't really have the ability to play that often and it isn't as convenient as it was in college, now I have to find a way to go to the gym (I do try an play everything I can, and right now that consists of volleyball and I just signed up for an indoor soccer league starting in January).

Here's that photo timeline I know you all have been waiting for ... with captions that would probably be funnier if I was writing them on a Friday or Saturday night.


Senior Prom - Spring 2001, this was the heaviest I have ever been, right around 285 and at this point in my life I had about zero strength so it was all padding.


Ireland - August 2004, this is probably the best shape I was ever in, around 215. I think this is from Kilkenny and the wall is part of some castle ruins that were on the property of the B&B we were staying at.


Florence, Italy - March 2005, My sister and I in Italy, back up to about 225 (probably more than that when I got home, but I did walk around the city for several hours each day, so maybe not).


Chile - January 2008, I don't think this picture is an accurate representation, I think the suit was sitting weird ... but I look at this whenever I need motivation to work out ... also of note is that this is the same suit I wore in the first picture because my suits from college aren't really the right size anymore. Around 275.


This is another one from Chile that I like, so I figured I'd post it.

Expect funny stories of my working out failures (but hopefully successes) and maybe I'll be able to run in the St. Paddy's Day 5K which is my goal for the end of this competition.

Happy Birthday Aunt Karen, when can I visit?

Today is my godmother's birthday and since they read this from Hawaii, I figured I would send out a Happy Birthday. I hate giving cards and don't need to receive one to know someone cares, plus my memory is shit so saying I hate them gets me off the hook a little when I don't send one to someone I should (which is everyone). Also, I am trying to score some points so I can go visit someday when I get some money and someone (of the female variety) that wants to go to Hawaii and passes my godfather's strict physique requirements. Seriously, he needs to be sent a picture before I can bring a guest. Just kidding ... maybe.

A Blast from the Past

I have been writing a post and going through old pictures and came across a fun one ... well, it is fun for me and I thought I'd share it.

Yup, that's me ... and this is my family

Battle of the Beltways with a side order of frigid

Sunday was a fun day ... haha ... get it ... it rhymes. This should be the last of my barrage of posts for the day.

The Ravens - Redskins game was moved to 8:15 which proved to be good for hot chocolate sales but that's about it. It was cold during the tailgate and even colder during the game. I got to the lot around 4:30 and realized that I wanted to go home to my 58 degree house cause I cold walk around in shorts and still be comfortable. Here, I was wearing UA (Under Armour) pants with jeans over them, long warm socks with a second pair on top, a UA cold gear long sleeved mock turtleneck thing with a long sleeve shirt over it with a jersey over it with a hoodie of it with a ski jacket over it, and a cheap pair of gloves they sold me in the parking lot with a nice pair of gloves over them ... and a knit beanie ... with my hood up. It was cold ... and especially cold for me since my life goal is to move to Arizona and never see snow again.

The game was great (defensively). I'm very glad the Ravens got out to an early lead and were winning comfortably toward the end of the 3rd quarter so I could leave and start to feel my extremities again. I don't know how the people at the Pittsburgh game handled the 7 degree weather, but I guess they are more used to it. Ed Reed was a beast all game and in the next play from the picture below he decided to run backwards into the end zone after picking up the Portis fumble that he caused.

I like the Redskins, but I live in Baltimore and like the Ravens more. Since they are in different conferences and only play each other once every 4 years, I am OK with cheering for both. I would probably be more of a Skins fan if I grew up watching a lot of football but my grandpa was more of a Orioles fan and I went to a ton of those games (including Cal's 2131) instead. Of course I find baseball to be one of the most boring sports there is, so figure that one out.

Santa's Coming to Town

Saturday began very painfully. I needed lots of water before I could head to my mom's house. From there I curled up in the passenger seat and let her drive to the hostess' house. Everything got better once we got there and we waited as all the families started showing up.

Once everyone was there I went upstairs and changed into the suit, rang some bells and waited till I heard all the parents saying, "what's that, Santa's here." I had no idea what I was doing, but luckily 90% of the kids were 2 or under and didn't know what was happening either. My favorite moments were with Sienna (11 months old), Olivia (17 months old) and my Godson (27 months old). Sienna was great because she just seemed like the happiest kid in the world at the time. She was swinging her arms and smiling and looking around; she really appearred to love being the center of attention (but who doesn't when they are a kid). Olivia on the other hand ... she wanted nothing to do with me. The moment I said I had a gift for her and her mommy started picking her up she began screaming. She was waving her arms around too, but trying to break free from her mom carrying her over to see me. Her mommy sat on my lap holding her for thier pictures, but the whole time Olivia was leaning out trying to be as far away from me as possible. My Godson was funny because he had his blanket and was clutching it for dear life the entire time. He posed for his pictures (below) holding it, held it when he gave me a high five, and held it when he got off my lap and started to walk away. As he was going I said, "Do you want your present?" Before I even finished that question the blanket was on the floor and the gift was in his hands.

Overall it was a good experience. I was happy to make the kids and their parents smile. Wearing the suit though is a different story, it was not comfortable and the beard and wig made me feel like I was in the desert. I must have smelled pretty bad after because the suit was definately not made of light fabric. Also, this is the same suit that was worn by the Santa when I was a kid ... so it is well over 20 years old. Plus, I think the tallest person wearing it was maybe 6' tall and I am over 6'3'' ... I also probably have about 70 lbs. on any of them. Oh well, got to start working on a better act for next year.

Friday Night Shenanigans

Of course it takes me until Wednesday to get around to posting about Friday. I guess this can be considered a good thing since I have been busy with my job and am happy to have a job (but who wouldn't want to employ me?). A really good friend got laid off Friday and that sucks a lot, as did some people I liked but wouldn't really consider a friend.

Friday night's small holiday party was great ... well, at least the parts I remember were. It was at Boozer's house and it has been determined that she can make party food like no one else. She should have a show on the food network. I have a picture of some of it, but let's just say it was great and I won't miss one of her parties ever again.



The night involved lots of beer pong (indoors to prevent hypothermia), WoW comments toward Ish, and me finishing a whole bottle of Captain's Private Stock. The night came to a conclusion shortly after I was discovered passed out on the floor in one of the room's in the basement and everyone decided they wanted to write on me but couldn't since I was being Santa the next day. After I woke up, the volleyball people that were still there posed for a team shot with the hoodies we won from the Baltimore Beach fall league (Do I look as though I consumed an entire bottle of rum? I think so). I was told we went to the bar shortly after this picture and I ordered water (no ice) had some then told them I needed to go. When I woke up Saturday, all my clothes were nicely folded and my keys and money was organized, why can't I do that every night when I go home sober?

Holiday Parties this Weekend

My friend Boozer from my volleyball team is having a holiday party tonight for the team and a bunch of friends. Several of my friends from work are coming with me and this should provide a perfect distraction from the earlier events of the day. I don't know if we are staying at her house the entire time or if we are going to venture out later on, either way it should be a great time.

As I said earlier, tomorrow is my first performance as Santa. I really don't know what to expect and don't know if I will be into it, but it will be nice to see all the excited kids. I also don't know a lot of the kids' names so I feel like I need to put together an index card and tape it to my sleeve like a quarterback does with their plays. I just hope there are some good pictures. Think it's acceptable if I drink before, it will definitely increase my commitment to acting like Santa?

Not necessarily holiday themed, but Sunday will definitely be a party. The Ravens - Redskins game is at 8:15 and I will be tailgating from 3:30ish on. I'll probably get to Fed Hill before that and watch some of the 1 o'clock games at Cross Street Market. Don't expect any posts until Monday at the earliest, but if there are any they will probably be lies and written after quite a bit of drinking.

Friday Layoffs

So the cuts came today and all I can say right now is that this sucks. The atmosphere here blows and I am going to miss a bunch of people that are gone. I can't really say anything else right now but am glad I have a holiday party tonight to consume my attention

Fail is the Theme for this Half of the Week

So I completely failed at getting into the office at 4 AM yesterday morning and I blame it on this Internet thing these kids today are using to send messages instantly to one another until 1 AM. I did get in sometime during the 7 AM hour though. Got a lot of what I needed to done but still have some to finish up today and tomorrow before starting on the project I was up all Sunday night working on. Today is a different story all together, I didn't get in until after 10. The only upsetting part about that was our cafeteria closes for breakfast at 9:30 and I love their breakfast foods. Oh, that and the fact my company announced layoffs ... which is awesome and really motivates me to complete all this stuff. Those affected will be told tomorrow (I think).

I also feel obliged to mention the Terps victory over Michigan last night and another year of the ACC winning the ACC - Big Ten challenge. Sorry Corey (btw, do you know a contractor for minor brick work, I haven't been able to get in touch with the guy I used for other stuff). The game wasn't pretty (at least the first half), but the Terps won and I like how aggressively they are going after the ball; the rebound differential was huge. It was also pretty cool because Shawne Merriman was there for a coat drive he sponsors annually (I guess that is a plus side of being out for the season since he would be suiting up for a game against the Raiders tonight otherwise) and Clinton Portis was sitting court side for most of the game. He probably didn't appreciate the mix of cheers and boos from the obviously mixed crowd of Ravens and Redskins fans. I also wonder if there would have been more cheers if the Skins weren't playing the Ravens this weekend, or if he didn't play for the U.

On a completely separate topic, this weekend should be fun ... I'm going to be Santa at a party for the kids in my family's huge group of friends. My godson is part of the group and really the only reason I am doing this ... that and I am the closest to Santa's physique out of the group (even though I don't think the Santa of legend was 6'4''). I'll be sure to get pictures and post them. I am doing a bunch of other fun stuff this weekend and will probably mention that stuff later tonight or sometime tomorrow.

Busy, busy work week

This week has been ridiculously crazy at work and it all has to do with the fact I am the quintessential procrastinator. I have a shit-ton of work due this week and had over a week to do it but decided to wait until Sunday night to start (I started previously but didn't make much headway cause I tend to get easily distracted). I'll admit that this stuff would have taken the entire week if I worked on it during regular hours regardless of my procrastination so it is pretty impressive that I'll be able to get it done, and it will be great work ... cause that's how I roll.

I went into work on Sunday night at around 10 PM and didn't leave till 2:30 the next afternoon. This was a long time to be at work and I started to get into a zombie state of mind toward the end. I did end up writing at least 20 pages worth of workflows and procedures and other analyst crap while still having to support everything that was breaking with the applications my team supports. I proceeded to go home and pass the F out until having to go back into work at 7:30 AM today. I got a significant amount done but still have more and will be heading into the office around 4 AM tomorrow (Wednesday) ... I'll end up putting in well over 40 hours for the week by EOD (end of day) tomorrow. Luckily, everything is due tomorrow afternoon so Thursday and Friday will be normal days, even though I have to work late Friday.

Tomorrow, I won't be able to go home and sleep right after work because instead I am going to the Terps basketball game for the ACC/Big Ten challenge against Michigan. My friend from work (haven't given him a nickname yet), my dad and Betty are going. I don't have high expectations for the Terps this season but really want to get a look at freshmen Sean Mosley and Jin So Kim. Its going to be a long day ... and week. Bed time!

Loving me some Louisiana Crabs

Saturday I went to my dad's girlfriend's (remember, Betty?) house for dinner (and watch the Terps fall apart). I met her brother, his partner (both from San Diego), and her mom. I liked them all and her brother was pretty funny and very outspoken. Her son Bamm was there too. While waiting for dinner and trying not to cry from the disaster that is the Terps, we (Me, Bamm, Betty's brother and his partner) played several games of Wii bowling. I have a Wii and haven't played it since my graduation party in the beginning of the summer so this was a good time and makes me think I want to start having people over to play again. After playing Wii, Bamm wanted to play Warhawk (a PS3 war game) online with me. I own this game too, but have only played it twice in my life so it was a fairly new undertaking. We play for about an hour until Betty left to go pick up dinner.

Betty got back with the crabs, but I can't remember where she got them; she lives out in the country so I wouldn't know anything around there anyway. Everyone sat down to eat while my dad and I watched the final pick-6 thrown by Turner this regular season. I haven't had crabs in a while (mainly due to lack of funding) and was pretty happy to get some this late in the year and good ones at that. Since I live very close to the water in Baltimore, I was getting crabs a lot over the summer, there are a lot of good places nearby. I assumed they were Maryland crabs but never knew for sure. These were obviously from Louisiana, they other primary source of this kind of crab. These were very good and had the right amount seasoning on them, nice and spicy. The only problem now is I want to get them again but don't want to spend the money. I know what the title says but I definitely love me some Maryland crabs more.